Archive for June, 2010

Life supports us with love, and it is up to us whether or not we can see the gift it is offering.

This morning I am aware of some feelings of vulnerability. How I choose to respond to these feelings is the opportunity being offered  to me.  In the past I would have gone into panic and survival and felt like my world was going to fall apart without much provocation. I have been so fond of drama and fighting with the world, but these days Im aware of how counter-productive this approach can be. Sounds pretty apparent, doesn’t it? Sort of like a great big  Well d’uh. But really, I see lots of people go around in a state of non awareness reacting to life in great big hairy angry Im- such- a- victim kinds of  ways, that I know I’m not alone.

When the mail came yesterday with a notice that momentarily sent me into a panic, I just kept breathing. I went back to the Four Agreements (see sidebar), to see what the lesson might be for me, and whaddya know? Really, all four of the agreements apply to the situation at hand.

I write about all of this to remind myself and share with you that we always have choices. Yesterday when I was in panic, at one point I wondered “what can I create inside to feel better to make this easier?”

And so I’ll just keep asking myself these questions. What is the gift? What is my part? Can I be true to my word and my values? What do I need to do to do my best? What do I want? What is my intent? What’s my next step.

These are the questions I hope will help as I navigate the moments when Life Happens in ways I never really expect.


Read Full Post »

I like to make note of personal change when I become aware of it. Last night I was in a meditative state and I enjoyed being in the moment. Do you relate to being agitated, antsy, allowing the monkey mind to take over? Do you hear the voices whining “aren’t we done yet? what time is it? are you sure you are doing it correctly?” The mind can be so silly, and so darned persistent!

But last night during the monthly Reiju blessing offered by Pamir Kiciman, I allowed myself to just be and receive, to stop worrying, to watch those voices rise up but not give them power. I know that this is what we always read about meditation, but last night I gave myself that gift of letting go. In the moment last night I let go of the voice that said “I don’t meditate” or “I have trouble with meditation” or “I don’t like sitting and not be doing something.” Last night I saw myself as someone who is not those voices. And I allowed in the blessings of reiju energy, which I experienced as soft and yummy, uplifting and light and transporting. I experienced sweet dreams last night, slept soundly, woke knowing I had visited other planets and came back with an awareness of being bathed in blue light.

What if I allowed that experience of being more often? I wonder what that might be like?

The photograph above is of redwood tree needles. I was attracted to the new growth of the needles when I took the photo in March. When I look at the photo now, I see energy dancing.

What a blessing it is to see these moments of newness and to allow the receiving of the gift.

Does the shift I describe resonate with you? I’d love to hear your story.


I experience joy in letting others know about the love that Pamir offers to humanity by recommending his monthly Reiju blessings.  It has been a significant part of my healing process for the past year. You can read his description of Reiju here

Read Full Post »